Every man builds his world in his own image. He has the power to choose, but no power to escape the necessity of choice.
Ayn Rand
One dinner time, I listened to my husband story. He told me about our friend who has an economic problem. His friend thought he has no ability to work hard because of many reasons; such as it was hard for him to make decision in his life. The problem is we know him very well and we were sad to see that he struggled in his life. We talked about any possibilities to help him but I couldn’t find one. In my opinion we can not help people whom he or she never realizes that he or she has an ability to work in his or her life. We all know that our friend is a very talented person. He didn’t trust himself that he has those wonderful talents to make a living. We involved into a long discussion.
I spontaneously said,” He doesn’t want to take his responsibility in his life. I enjoy working everyday” My husband didn’t agree with me, he said,” Only for you enjoy working” I said, “ My dad always says life is a responsibility, You have to take it or leave it. It is your choice. You want to enjoy working or you hate working it is all yours. You have perfect hands, feet and amazing brain. Those are you first asset and capital to make a living” My dad used to show me how disabled people could make a living and they looked happy.
I just learn in life I have the ability to work, I have talents. Those are my assets and capital inside me. First choice for me is to take the responsibility, second choice is to accept it with a joy in my heart and be thankful for my life. In life there are so many things that we can not control or change. I would rather not try to change those circumstances; the most important I always can change my attitude and my mind. Wayne Dyer said:
Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice.
I remembered when I couldn’t study abroad because some reasons. I had to study in certain university and I had to take Accounting major. My dad came to me and said,” Sorry I can not give you many choices this time. I know that you don’t like this situation. Education will enrich your knowledge and you can use it in your life one day. This is your choice. Take it as your responsibility and then choice how you will accept it. If you take it with joy, you will feel that is easy. If you can not accept this, you will walk with a heavy burden in your life.”
Life is responsibility and it is a choice. I took my dad’s advice in every responsibility I take. That is true… the burden of life not because life is too hard but because we can not make a good choice to accept it.
There is no value in life except what you choose to place upon it and no happiness in any place except what you bring to it yourself.
Henry David Thoreau
**Lina Kartasasmita** 12.05AM Oct 28, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
“I trust you”
The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.
Ernest Hemingway
One day, my husband and I went to meet his good friend. They were college friends when they studied abroad. We talked about random things until we ended up talking about our children’s education. We have children in the same age. We were ready to send our first daughter to go abroad for her education during that time. Our friend said that he worried to send his children to study abroad because of the culture differences and other life style issues.
I am a simple person. In my opinion if we as parents already teach our children the value of our culture, the value of our family, the rest of that we just need to trust the children. My husband asked me many times about how much I trust my children to go abroad and to live by themselves. I said I have done my part and the rest of the part will be in the children’s hand. It depends on their decision and their choice of life. We can not do anything or we can not control their future. We only can help them to see clearly their opinion about life, we can tell them how to judge something but we can not control their decision. It is about trust. I trust that I have put a right foundation in my children’s life and I have to trust them that they know what they have to do with their life.
My husband asked me, what if the children made mistakes in their life. That is common that people make mistakes and we should have a big heart to forgive them. I don’t want to fill my mind with negative thinking. I just want to be positive in life. The only thing I do in life, I keep telling myself … I trust my children and I will see them will pass all obstacles in their life with the best decision and choices.
This is my statement to my lovely daughters, “I trust you that you will make a right decision and a right choice in your life. No matter what happen in your life. You make mistakes or you are successful. You are still our daughters. We always have forgiveness for you; we will always be there for you to support and to encourage you. We love you unconditionally”
I believe as Ralph Waldo Emerson said:
Trust men and they will be true to you; treat them greatly and they will show themselves great. Ralph Waldo Emerson
**Lina Kartasasmita** at 5.16PM Oct 25, 2010
Ernest Hemingway
One day, my husband and I went to meet his good friend. They were college friends when they studied abroad. We talked about random things until we ended up talking about our children’s education. We have children in the same age. We were ready to send our first daughter to go abroad for her education during that time. Our friend said that he worried to send his children to study abroad because of the culture differences and other life style issues.
I am a simple person. In my opinion if we as parents already teach our children the value of our culture, the value of our family, the rest of that we just need to trust the children. My husband asked me many times about how much I trust my children to go abroad and to live by themselves. I said I have done my part and the rest of the part will be in the children’s hand. It depends on their decision and their choice of life. We can not do anything or we can not control their future. We only can help them to see clearly their opinion about life, we can tell them how to judge something but we can not control their decision. It is about trust. I trust that I have put a right foundation in my children’s life and I have to trust them that they know what they have to do with their life.
My husband asked me, what if the children made mistakes in their life. That is common that people make mistakes and we should have a big heart to forgive them. I don’t want to fill my mind with negative thinking. I just want to be positive in life. The only thing I do in life, I keep telling myself … I trust my children and I will see them will pass all obstacles in their life with the best decision and choices.
This is my statement to my lovely daughters, “I trust you that you will make a right decision and a right choice in your life. No matter what happen in your life. You make mistakes or you are successful. You are still our daughters. We always have forgiveness for you; we will always be there for you to support and to encourage you. We love you unconditionally”
I believe as Ralph Waldo Emerson said:
Trust men and they will be true to you; treat them greatly and they will show themselves great. Ralph Waldo Emerson
**Lina Kartasasmita** at 5.16PM Oct 25, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Life is Responsibility:” Me … not mommy”
Life is a gift, and it offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back by becoming more.
Tony Robbins
I used to keep in touch with my old friends, one day I was online on Yahoo messenger and I found one of my friends also online. I started to type “Hi” and then we had a long chatting line after that. Even we live in the same city Jakarta; we haven’t met for such a long time. My friend told me that she was busy because that was a final exam at her children’s school. She was busy to help her children to memorize and to study all subjects from Math, Science and Social studies. She found out that I never helped my children to memorize before the exam. The big question was how I did that.
The answer that I have in my life, I never taught my children or helped them to study. I just taught them “Life is responsibility and consequence” Their responsibilities in life, they need to do their best in everything, bring the best out of themselves, they have to use their talents which God have given in them. The consequence will follow after each responsibility. If they didn’t study and they fail in their exam, it is not a mother’s responsibility or others. It is their own responsibility, their own consequence. Each responsibility they take, they will also get the consequence. No one can help them except themselves.
I used to ask my daughters when they were in kinder garden school. I believe they still remember my question until now. My question was,” If you learn something, who will get smarter? If you study hard who will get the praise? “The answer would be,” Me… not mommy” As a mom I just taught them to know what the purpose of their life, the great attitude and foundation in their life. I believe “Children are empty glasses which we need to fulfill inside the glass and not to decorate the exterior of the glasses”
Some parents preferred to help their children to memorize and to study instead of prepared their children to face difficulties or obstacles in life. Parents used to see good grade as a goal. But in life, grade only represented our ability at school, at one moment in life or one subject which probably we even didn’t like it. I saw my children as blessings from God. They have their talents, their own dreams and their own life. My responsibilities as a mom are to love them, to accept and to encourage them.
If I never helped my children to study or to memorize the school subjects, what have I done for them?. That was a great question. The answer was “I am always there for them; I give them support when they need, I encourage them and I motivate them to bring out their best. I always say,” Yes, you can do it” I am there for them as a mom, a friend and a coach. “
Life is responsibility and as Jim Rohn said:
You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of.
Jim Rohn
Let the children learn to take their responsibility and let them make themselves know the purpose of their life. God has given the children talents and abilities. Our responsibility as parents just make our children can see what they have in them.
**Lina Kartasasmita** Jakarta, 24 October 2010 at 6.11PM
Tony Robbins
I used to keep in touch with my old friends, one day I was online on Yahoo messenger and I found one of my friends also online. I started to type “Hi” and then we had a long chatting line after that. Even we live in the same city Jakarta; we haven’t met for such a long time. My friend told me that she was busy because that was a final exam at her children’s school. She was busy to help her children to memorize and to study all subjects from Math, Science and Social studies. She found out that I never helped my children to memorize before the exam. The big question was how I did that.
The answer that I have in my life, I never taught my children or helped them to study. I just taught them “Life is responsibility and consequence” Their responsibilities in life, they need to do their best in everything, bring the best out of themselves, they have to use their talents which God have given in them. The consequence will follow after each responsibility. If they didn’t study and they fail in their exam, it is not a mother’s responsibility or others. It is their own responsibility, their own consequence. Each responsibility they take, they will also get the consequence. No one can help them except themselves.
I used to ask my daughters when they were in kinder garden school. I believe they still remember my question until now. My question was,” If you learn something, who will get smarter? If you study hard who will get the praise? “The answer would be,” Me… not mommy” As a mom I just taught them to know what the purpose of their life, the great attitude and foundation in their life. I believe “Children are empty glasses which we need to fulfill inside the glass and not to decorate the exterior of the glasses”
Some parents preferred to help their children to memorize and to study instead of prepared their children to face difficulties or obstacles in life. Parents used to see good grade as a goal. But in life, grade only represented our ability at school, at one moment in life or one subject which probably we even didn’t like it. I saw my children as blessings from God. They have their talents, their own dreams and their own life. My responsibilities as a mom are to love them, to accept and to encourage them.
If I never helped my children to study or to memorize the school subjects, what have I done for them?. That was a great question. The answer was “I am always there for them; I give them support when they need, I encourage them and I motivate them to bring out their best. I always say,” Yes, you can do it” I am there for them as a mom, a friend and a coach. “
Life is responsibility and as Jim Rohn said:
You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of.
Jim Rohn
Let the children learn to take their responsibility and let them make themselves know the purpose of their life. God has given the children talents and abilities. Our responsibility as parents just make our children can see what they have in them.
**Lina Kartasasmita** Jakarta, 24 October 2010 at 6.11PM
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)